I DID IT! I SURVIVED THE FIRST WEEK.
That was a little dramatic. Lol. It’s not bad here. I’m okay. I wouldn’t say I’m totally great 100% of the time, but I’m okay. It’s an adjustment. I grew up in a town where I had to drive like a half hour to get to a Walmart and 45 minutes or more depending on traffic to get to a Chick-fil-A or Starbucks. That 30 min/45 min time travel time was only one way. When I moved to Tampa, it was an adjustment. All of a sudden traffic lights lasted five freaking minutes and I didn’t know the person stopped at the light next to me like I did in the town I did all of my growing up in. Walmarts were closer, there was a Starbucks at every corner, and there was SO MUCH to do all the time. It was so strange. But I adjusted and I grew to LOVE it all.
Now here I am. I have to GPS a place to get freaking milk.
I’m currently sitting in a study room in one of the hundreds of libraries around here to try and get my life together and have a productive afternoon. This is my view. Neato, to be honest! Still weird though.
The building with the American flag on it has a little convenience store/market type thing in the other corner. I actually just went there to get some groceries so I don’t have to go out every time I get a craving for a damn banana or whatever. They didn’t have grocery bags because they’re working to support the planet and GO GREEN and all and I totally support it. However, it would have been nice had someone told me that before I bought a crap ton of stuff. Whatever. I piled it all into my Michael Kors, hands, and arms and struggled through the 15 min walk home. I dropped it off, was annoyed, so left. And here I am.
The old me would have said fuck all of this and been on a plane back home to “figure it out.” This new and improved me is opening all of this with slightly hesitant though mostly wide arms and learning to adjust. I could have easily went to medical school with friends, in familiar territory, and just a drive away from the people I couldn’t live this life without. I really had to go big, didn’t I? That’s okay though. I’m tired of being so afraid of everything. I know that this next year is going to be one of the most influential ones in terms of me changing and growing and becoming this person that I’ve always wanted to become. I am excited for all of it. Trust me. I am.
I’ve already found some cool bars and restaraunts I want to take my friends and family to when they come visit me. I’ve mostly kept to myself since I’ve been here but once school starts in full, I know that will change. So much of me wants to take a train to NYC right now because that’s a lot more familiar to me than this place. I actually discovered an app called “Wanderu” and it gives me the cheapest public transportation options and links to buy tickets and such. But if I do that right now… I’ll be running from all of this unknown and not really giving it the chance that it deserves.
I still feel like I’m on vacation and just waiting for the moment I need to check into my flight back home. But that’s not coming. I won’t be going home for at least 4 months, maybe more. This is home now. Yesterday I went to MGH and walked around there for a little while. It. Is. Massive. To be honest, it felt really great to be in the hospital again despite the fact that I was literally doing nothing but observing and walking around. I walked by the ER and immediately thought of all of my BRH peeps 💚💚💚💚 I went into an old medical supply/equipment museum, too. That was completely amazing. It all was inspirational and motivational. I am living the dream now. This has always been the dream. It’s here. It’s incredible. I am so thankful and grateful. I’m the world’s most impatient person and cannot wait until all of this is more comfortable. It’s getting there 🤗
Until later, friends. ❤️